We're still here!

This blogging thing doesn't come naturally.  

I forget that I have this space, I mostly use this page as a bookmark for reading all of the blogs I follow.

They are WAY more interesting than I am.

But I do want to write our story too.  We can be interesting sometimes.

Like, how Olivia passed her hardest 3rd grade multiplication test EVER today.  We all felt so accomplished, it was a family effort and she was so very proud of herself.

And how I told Brennen today that I was proud of how he thought about Jesus a lot in our daily lives and he told me, How can I not?  Every time I look at fire and lava, I think of how Jesus had pain for us.  And every time I look at rocks and stones, I think of how Jesus came out of the grave when His stone rolled away. I just think about Him, Mama.

Wow.

Don't be fooled. We also have lots of drama (a.k.a. earring changes, loose teeth, long division, "accidental" punches).

So, I guess we can be interesting if we need to be.  

Legoland

This year on Spring Break we got Legoland passes. Nate and I had a talk with the kids about how they REALLY would love Disneyland passes, but HELLO they are too expensive. So, we all decided to save our money and we would get Legoland passes for the year for half the price. When the day finally arrived, Liv and Bren had each saved up $70 of their own money to contribute. We almost felt bad taking it from them, but they were happy to hand it over, glad to do their part. We felt like this was an important life lesson for them to learn that fun things sometimes come at a sacrifice and also that they are each a contributing part of our little family.

Right now, Brennen is obsessed with all things Star Wars, so lucky for him it is Star Wars days there. He was so excited to see all the characters made out of Legos.

Nate sort of enjoyed himself too...

Stay tuned for many more Legoland adventures!

93 and counting...

I'm thankful she is still here.

I'm thankful my kids will remember her.

I'm thankful for the part she has played in my whole life.

Liv at 9

Two weeks ago, Olivia got her ears pierced. I can hardly believe I can write those words. Our very tomboyish daughter has been growing up a lot lately and is starting to see some benefits to being born a girl. That's not to say that she likes dresses now, or obsesses over her hair by any means, but she did express a desire out of the blue to get her ears pierced. Nate and I were so pleasantly surprised by this change of heart that we didn't hesitate to give her permission. What really touched our hearts was how we asked her about why she wanted to get earrings and she said, Well, I know that God made me a girl and He wants me to be a girl and I don't have to be super girly, but I want to be how He made me.

I love this girl.

Nolan and Kenna

How cute are these two?

It's hard enough to wrap my mind around the fact that my own kids are growing up before my eyes, but these little ones are supposed to stay little! Lately, I am finding that this nephew and niece of mine are becoming real people. Shocker, I know.

Nolan is the smartest 4 year old mathematician I know and can add numbers in his head and really knows the clock! He is becoming quite the baseball player, hitting the ball WITHOUT the tee. Do you die?

Kenna Lulu is as sweet as pie and as girly as they get! She just got her ears pierced and they look adorable on her tiny earlobes. She LOVES all kinds of treats and dessert, a girl after Olivia's heart. She is a real gymnast and just learned how to do a backwards somersault!

I love these munchkins so much and am so thankful I get to be a part of their everyday life.

Homework

C'MON, SUMMER.

Romans 12:1-3 The Message

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you:

Take your everyday, ordinary life- your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life- and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for Him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God.

You'll be changed from the inside out.

Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you...

Living, then, as every one of you does, in pure grace, it's important that you not misinterpret yourselves as people who are bringing this goodness to God. No, God brings it all out of you. The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what He does for us, not by what we are and what we do for Him.

Hole-y Moley

Brennen is a tooth-losing machine this month. Within two days, he pulled out his own two bottom loose teeth. I was so impressed and extremely relieved because I get the heebee-jeebee's when I even think about the root being yanked out of my poor kid's gums. I am totally grossed out by the whole process and our experience with Olivia was... let's just say, very different. Here is a picture of the two gaping holes:

He looks so different to me now! His face is changed forever and I am sad about it. His teeth have always been really straight and tiny and now they are coming up

HUGE

and

straight. up. crooked.

He is growing up so fast this last year and this was a huge milestone for him.

I'm so proud of him.

Ode to Costco

Oh, Costco, how I love thee... and hate thee.

I love you for your wide selection of cozy Carter's footy pajamas for the cheapest price in town. I adore how you sell the Carter's 3-piece outfits for less than $10 when I need an inexpensive baby gift.

I hate you for your Photo services. I despise the picture quality of my Christmas card this year, after we actually spent good money to get our pictures done by a professional. I had high hopes for our card this year and you dashed them. Never again.

I love you for your samples, they are aplenty. I love how you allow me to taste an unfamiliar food to see if I would like to buy it one day, you are so smart.

I hate you for your parking lot and for your long lines. You seem to attract the most unfriendly, impatient people in Temecula. There are never enough spaces during the holidays and I hate how I can only turn right out of the main thorough-fare. The lines zig-zag maddeningly and always make me squeeze next to the previously mentioned unfriendlies.

I love you for your book selection. Where else can I find such a vast array of interesting books for such affordable prices? I love how you offer hard bound and paperback. I love that I can buy a fun Elmo book in the same place I can get another Kristen Hannah novel.

I hate you for your online calendar making experience. It is the pits and I'm rebelling this year because of you. My poor parents will not be getting an adorable personalized calendar and I will blame you for breaking this tradition. I just can't handle the buffering and the schizophrenic behavior of your website. It's taking me over the edge.

I love you for your hot dogs.

I hate you for tempting me with the Diet Coke you sell that I don't drink anymore.

I love your large carts, but I hate how heavy they are.

I love picking up a new hoodie, but I hate how you don't put my groceries in bags.

So, Costco, as it turns out I do love you. But you are walking a fine line, my friend.

One year

Today it has been one year since this little girl had her trach removed. One year since we heard her little voice for the first time. One year ago God healed Reagan.

He is good.

This year has been one filled with joy and celebration, marveling at every word from her mouth. It has also been a year of turmoil and wrestling with God in my heart. I could not walk away from all that had happened and not feel in my spirit, Where did THAT come from? I wish I could say that I unconditionally trusted what God had done was good and that we all were better for it, but I have to say it has taken some time. I am much further down the path than one year ago today, but God and I are still working it out together and I am learning to see this from His point of view. I know in my core that I will never abandon Him, but I have never been hurt this way either. It is unsettling to feel upset with God. I am learning that it is my pride that feels offended, mad that this had to happen.

All of this to say that I am still growing and changing and working it out. Which is I'm sure just what God wanted all along. No matter how I feel about why it had to happen, I will forever say that God is good because He chose to heal Reagan and give her a normal life. I do not understand it all, but I am sure that He showed mercy and love to our family on that November 9th last year.

Amen.